Prius 307,255,800,000,000 mile (or thereabouts) maintenance

All this time travel is really exhausing, y'know, and after a while you just start getting a little punchy. But let's be real here: when not referring to a construction set from infinitoy.com, "zoobs" is a technical term used to describe arbitrary and often nebulous quantities of energy and usually heard around production-tech gigs. "I twofered those parcans in but I don't think the circuit's giving me any zoobs -- check the dimmer rack?"

One nice thing about the Prius hybrid system is that it can run on either zoobs or dead dinosaurs, although at this primitive stage of technology we tend to rely more heavily on the latter. But we'll get there! Zoobs just fall from the sky, and all you need is the right apparatus to collect them and convert into moton flux with a suitable forward vector. A flux capacitor is thus an essential part of the system, that stores up our zoobs until we need them. This early prototype is fairly limited in what it can add to the overall system, but is already giving some promising results.


Here's an internal look at how the flux capacitor works. First, only the real vintage caps full of PCBs are up to the task, since nobody is afraid of the newer ones. The test clips connect it to ... somewhere behind the seat back. We've got an ordinary luminous-flux meter here, and on the back of the pickup head there's a white LED with some ghastly-green gel over it for the scanning-field effect. The battery is easy to palm out of sight. The rest is filled in with gaffer's tape -- always gaff tape, because gaff tape is really important, almost as important as coffee. Duct tape wouldn't even come close here, and besides, its sticky residue would quickly clog up the capacitor's monomolecular wave chambers. The Force we need is much stronger with gaff tape, because its dark side is truly dark and the light side -- well, we never see the light side anyway, so who cares about that. The point is that if you want to move luminous zoobs from one place to another, the pickup sink electrode sleeves have to be really DARK to generate the right level of absorption quotient.

_H* 090401